I'm Happy, You're Happy....but What Is Happiness?

Recently a friend sent me an email asking me my secret to happiness. It took me by surprise as I didn't have an answer. I can remember a time in my life when my moods would swing, I had depression, but I was treated and do not live with that now. But happy? I wouldn't exactly call it that.

The truth is, I had to think about it. Growing up, I was known as morose, sad, and moody. What was this "happiness" thing. To be honest, I thought Rowan And Martin were onto something when they sarcastically said, "May the bluebird of happiness fly up your nose".

Psychologists tell us we are not all, but part of a product of our environments. I did not grow up in a happy environment. Nor did a lot of others. I don't even use the word dysfunctional anymore, since it is such a common phrase and it seems everyone "had it at one time or another". But those days are way in my past and I have had many happy and joyful experiences since that time. Many were small and many monumental. They each added up to my happiness, I suppose.

Happiness, to me, if there is such a thing, is really getting down to basics. By basics I mean go as far back as The U.S. Constitution "...and the pursuit of happiness" which is actually written by these stern men with no smiles, at least not in their renderings, but they knew the importance of it.

"To thine own self be true", said William Shakespeare. That statement alone showed how far ahead of his time he was, long before psychiatry and antidepressants ever existed, custom designed for those who had never been true to themselves. Shakespeare knew, being true to oneself, is a key element in being happier. I didn't say happy, though it could result in that. But I don't know a person who is true to him or herself who is not at least a bit cheerful. I may have even taken the phrase way to literally. I still think about it daily as decisions have to be made.

Given these facts, let's count how many ways we compromise our happiness, or make certain it does not happen. We take jobs which are terrible but pay well. We do not like our co-workers and they do not like us. We do not like our boss and he does not like us either. We get married and have kids out of peer pressure. All our friends and associates did it, but we were not ready, or the opposite. We decided not to get married as we grew up in an unhappy home, and we would "show our parents with sweet revenge" (That was my modus operandi for many years). Suddenly it occurred to me they didn't care what I did as long as I was in the pursuit of happiness. Besides, they were deceased. Or we go past our credit card limit paying astronomical interest for years to come, just to impress someone who never really cared in the first place. We forgot, what happiness we do get, generally comes from within.

We learn some mighty lessons from these "failures of adulthood" and I do not say that judgementally. I am no different than anyone else in this arena. I have changed careers many times (put on new masks) until I found the one that fit me. It worked and I am much happier. I didn't say happy. I dont know if I am or not. But I am usually optomistic.

I don't know that I am a happy person, but I am a lot happier than I was ten years ago, and I hope a decade from now I'm a lot happier than I am now. To repeat a great movie phrase from Robert DeNiro to Billy Crystal in "Analyze That" "It's a process, doc".

Simple is good. Complex is not so good. It is human nature to like drama. Leave it for the movies. Live your life more simply and experience more happiness. It is really that simple. Sounds cliche but I can guarantee you, in my half-century here on earth, I have an inkling of wisdom in that area.

Life is short. Do the work you love, regardless of the money. Study it hard. Research. Get to know it and love it. The money really will follow. If it doesn't, learn yet another vocation of interest until you are wearing the right mask. Career and money can contribute greatly to happiness, but money itself, for the sake of an uninteresting career, leaves one empty.

You don't have to be a cartoonist to be happy. It has been proven that exposing yourself to humor can help build your own self-esteem and develop your own sense of humor.

Dr. Bernie Siegel who wrote a best-seller in the 1980's, Love, Laughter, And Healing helped me a great deal when my mother was dying of cancer. I called him. He claims in his book that he had incurable brain cancer and exposed himself to many comedy movies, videos, cartoons, and sitcoms. He had no idea if it would help heal him, he just felt his mortality and wanted to laugh a bit. Within a few years, his brain cancer was in remission and he still is alive and writing two decades later. I have discussed this with him on several occasions and he offered up some of the greatest advice I ever had, expose your mom to humor. I went to the video store daily and found a different comedy film every day and we watched it together. It also brought me closer to my mom. She lived about four years longer than they expected.

Dr. Seigel's advice became paramount in my life and still is. It had a monumental effect on me. The only other such event was a Gary Larson Far Side exhibit at the Smithsonian in the mid-1980's. I saw just how important humor and cartooning really is in our culture. I never knew it at the time, that I would enter the world of cartooning, but my fans and friends insist it has a calming and healing effect. That adds to my happiness.

So please, give the gift of laughter today, whether its a joke, a book, a cartoon gift, or comedy video. Pass It Forward, as they say.

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The Internet's most popular offbeat cartoon is Londons Times www.londonstimes.us by Rick London. He also has numerous cartoon funny gift shops which he feels help spread happiness One cartoon gift item store is Top Cartoonist Rick London Shares Ways To Become Happier

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